Boy Oh Boy have I been dealing with a lot lately. People that know me from other social network sites and in real life have been put through the scaadium-suicidality of doom, as I know how to do it like no other. And I have been so pushed on my lack of freedom that I set out on a death quest, which has been tempered by my egoic need to get my story out, so I am planning on not leaping off a cliff to escape Zach Braff & Robin Williams (the biggest problem-makers, of all my enemies).
I feel reasonably confident that, after some time on a farm to recuperate on my soul damage from being around urban people, I'll go back into the world and people with work for me will be perfectly fine with my drama brushed under the rug as, "Political revolutionism". Smart people know that the Powers that Be are complex and powerful and even when I have some or most, the remainder still oppose. And shockingly, some remain impressed with all that I've done, because when I say "all I've done" I mean the overwhelming amount of education about Religious History, Spiritual Truths and the Nature of Reality in addition to the civil service of exposing politicians on important election issues, that so many people seem to take for granted, expecting my family to eat for free and just be honored that I get to answer life-and-death questions.
It seems to me to be Obviously not reasonable to ask me WORK questions and not pay me and then let me get spit on by citizens for not showing up to an office at the same time everyday. People, like myself, with IVY LEAGUE educations, abundant charisma and my level of connections, who get asked questions on the level of government and business that I do, are paid as consultants @ $thousands/day! So, my angst about the fuck-all US government, in bed with corporations and Israel trying to turn non-Jew human bodies into dollars or otherwise sequester planetary resources for white people, is still here. I just have a lot of emotional clairvoyant data that I should live because my support on S~TV (the fact that Millions of people 'meditate' and tune-in to hear my thoughts and clairvoyantly "watch" my life without media) is big, my allies are powerful, the world might go totally nuclear if Barack Obama lets Israel-allied Jew actors or the Federal Reserve-Murdoch crew terrorize me anymore.
I don’t want to be dealing with nuclear issues. I don’t want to deal with World Health Organization Bioterrorism. I don’t want to deal with a lot of things, but I get asked questions and can’t always control the answers. I don’t puff myself up as terribly important. I’m shockingly modest, in most people‘s opinions. It’s just when huge world leaders and celebrities are always on my phone, it seems to indicate that I have importance to them. At any rate, I want to upload my video clips, now with my little precious online time.
Thanks for reading!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
A year ago, I had a discussion with Jupiter in Marina del Rey
What a mess! I have been very verbally and imaginatively inflammatory and also seek employment. In general, I approve of very little going on in Washington DC and think the state of affairs around people's spirituality is of significant interest to many and have gotten glimpses of people's reactions to what they know to be true and world events that are reported and what just doesn't seem to make the papers or the television until fire and brimstone rain down or something.
Hi! I’m Suzanne Cowley Caadium, M.D. peculiarly gifted utmost questionable shaman, or whatever someone needs me to be, to survive economically, in service of my community, in local currency, on a scale of work matched to a given wage, with gratitude. A few posts down, I have a “Dear Prospective Employer” letter that is still fairly valid, but on a lot more controversial ground since I’ve been actively using the free media of social network websites to publicize my life, as trying to take on the larger media networks at this stage has me fearful for people’s lives around what “the Powers that Bee” may or may not control.
I’m have been accused of being anti-semitic. Many of my best friends and employers have been Jewish. I almost married Jewish a couple times, but, as unbelievable as it may seem in our midst in the progressive and strivingly color-blind Bay Area of California, I am in a major political struggle with people in the middle east over genetics. This particular group that has tried their hardest to get me on their team, using a variety of questionable tactics at best, identifies as “the Jews” or “Israel” (though the latter is an elected post and that topic has been alive for a while). And I have been staunchly in favor of globalism and mixed ethnicity as my hope for the future genetic protection of humanity.
At any rate, if you are a prospective employer, I wish to convey that my cover letter to your company is true and hope that this post helps fill in the gaps on my colorful resume of the past few years. I have a varied career history and totally controversial life, but when I apply my talents, I always leave a place better than I found it and was very selective in choosing “job ads” that sounded like a good fit for my character. Please read and watch any text or videos you find in a google search about me. My family has been totally wrapped up in the political mess of my life and we're working on it. Some people find this lucratively fascinating and other people scorn me or just can’t get their heads around me.
At any rate, take good care!
Hi! I’m Suzanne Cowley Caadium, M.D. peculiarly gifted utmost questionable shaman, or whatever someone needs me to be, to survive economically, in service of my community, in local currency, on a scale of work matched to a given wage, with gratitude. A few posts down, I have a “Dear Prospective Employer” letter that is still fairly valid, but on a lot more controversial ground since I’ve been actively using the free media of social network websites to publicize my life, as trying to take on the larger media networks at this stage has me fearful for people’s lives around what “the Powers that Bee” may or may not control.
I’m have been accused of being anti-semitic. Many of my best friends and employers have been Jewish. I almost married Jewish a couple times, but, as unbelievable as it may seem in our midst in the progressive and strivingly color-blind Bay Area of California, I am in a major political struggle with people in the middle east over genetics. This particular group that has tried their hardest to get me on their team, using a variety of questionable tactics at best, identifies as “the Jews” or “Israel” (though the latter is an elected post and that topic has been alive for a while). And I have been staunchly in favor of globalism and mixed ethnicity as my hope for the future genetic protection of humanity.
At any rate, if you are a prospective employer, I wish to convey that my cover letter to your company is true and hope that this post helps fill in the gaps on my colorful resume of the past few years. I have a varied career history and totally controversial life, but when I apply my talents, I always leave a place better than I found it and was very selective in choosing “job ads” that sounded like a good fit for my character. Please read and watch any text or videos you find in a google search about me. My family has been totally wrapped up in the political mess of my life and we're working on it. Some people find this lucratively fascinating and other people scorn me or just can’t get their heads around me.
At any rate, take good care!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Post #19
So few and far between my blogspot gets action. In case people's random google search on me leads them to this blog instead of the more active http://blog.myspace.com/drummess, I am alive as of 2010Sept8.
Still dealing with "258" stuff as I bring more revolutionists into my sphere, we seem to re-stoke old fires in Agriculture, governments and other Resource issues and power-based people.
I guess I hooked up with the most radical boyfriend yet and so the escalations on the dowry for my marriage hand are astronomic. We even got another several million dollars thrown in by the Entertainment industry for a third movie; People love Trilogies. (as much as baby laughter?)
And as we hear the question, "You've done X,Y, &Z, Suzanne, What are you gonna do next?" so often, for our next trick, we've just taken it to the highest improbability level of the Heart of Gold and said, "I want to bring a God down to Earth" because on Consensus, he would be the best Dad. And the Galaxy roared with Applause!
We're just getting through the Guardians of the Threshold now, certainly solving the trials by Fire, Water and Air.
Still dealing with "258" stuff as I bring more revolutionists into my sphere, we seem to re-stoke old fires in Agriculture, governments and other Resource issues and power-based people.
I guess I hooked up with the most radical boyfriend yet and so the escalations on the dowry for my marriage hand are astronomic. We even got another several million dollars thrown in by the Entertainment industry for a third movie; People love Trilogies. (as much as baby laughter?)
And as we hear the question, "You've done X,Y, &Z, Suzanne, What are you gonna do next?" so often, for our next trick, we've just taken it to the highest improbability level of the Heart of Gold and said, "I want to bring a God down to Earth" because on Consensus, he would be the best Dad. And the Galaxy roared with Applause!
We're just getting through the Guardians of the Threshold now, certainly solving the trials by Fire, Water and Air.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
finer tunings on my Socioeconomic-Chakra Development theory, for fun
It feels like I’m about to Launch. I think with a few contracts clarified, a production assistant can meet me any time, in Portland, as easily as Southwest offers pretty darn cheap flights to here. I almost even got my nails done today. I have a number of projects going, taking on more of the archetype of the performer, that has seemingly wanted to come out for a few years now. But now, chakra-synthesis literature, by request.
On the chakra level one: basic needs; food (covered)/ shelter (mostly covered)/ safety (mostly covered), but given the “mostly”, that means that I am still in need of this level of support, thus the job interviews/auditions of chakra level one work, which ties in closely with advertised-dollars per (sponsor) presence that can run in the millions (chakra level 7) and ‘any minute’ in the circuits that I roll with, who might recognize my talent for drawing people in better than others. It is curious the level of competition on this level of functioning.
On chakra two, anatomically located in the reproductive organs and symbolized by the color Orange, and qualities of Domesticity and family, I bought new jewelry for my navel piercing today, for the first time in 13 years. And boy is it sparkly. 5 black and white stars attached by sapphire ball to 14G purple metal barbell with purple opposing ball. I love it. I have offers for chakra level two up the wazoo. My current partner understands this system better than most. ~Sacred and Dangerous~ was a term that came up in a stage communication today in the astral living room. I like the folks I’m domesticating with at the moment.
Chakra level three is about the community. Symbolized by yellow flowers and the solar plexus, this is the spiritual organ that Rudolf Steiner connected as lotus with 10 petals. People functioning on this level are able to work. People too affected by social stimuli and other “mental illness” are not seemingly able to work very well. This is usually service-industry folks, not that that isn’t just their day job as they aspire to utmost heights in an art form. I feel loosely connected with my community here. There is some fracture on the issue of permanence. In LA, I’m chakra 3’ing just fine. I love you too, LA.. And if the Amero thing happens, It’s likely gonna have some very logical structure around the value of human labor tied in with agriculture and other economic standards tied in as well.
Chakra four is identified as the 12 petal lotus, in spiritual science terms. Love is the emotion most commonly associated with the heart region. There is a lot of interesting anatomy in the chest region that correlates with the pathology of the leading health risks in our culture. There are various emotional~spiritual~mental exercises that one can do to activate this spiritual organ. I think of the love on chakras 1, 2 & 3 as different than level 4. Vocationally, people who function on this higher chakra level are more educated, more bureaucratically distributed, and teachers, nurses, higher service work.
Chakra five is represented by the 16 petal lotus, the color blue, is centered at the throat, anatomically symbolized by the thyroid, which is shaped like a butterfly: a common image for creative energy. This is the creative will. People functioning on the level of the creative will are often working and involved in entertainment, politics, higher education, research & development. Interestingly, this is represented by the voice and in higher paced industries, people are in constant communication. Intricately tied with the Pituitary Gland, a gland that isn't as clearly understood in the chakra system I've been describing.
Chakra six is located at the Pineal gland, represented by the 3rd eye in a variety of symbolic systems and active on the surface of the body on the forehead. This is the spiritual level of Insight, represented by the color Indigo. People functioning on the level of seeing into systems are likely Intelligence operatives and other well-paid consultants. I heard that creational ability was about linking the spin of the 5-6th chakras, and in this way, it looks like the pituitary is functioning as a 5th chakra center (perhaps 5 1/2?) in a figure 8.
After learning about astral projection, I put together these concepts of esoteric anatomy, "will" = intention, creativity and control, and walking through a barrio one day, I taught some random 9 year-old kid how to hold his mom up like a dog by the scruff for self-defense. There is also sacred geometry associated with the chakra energies and the pyramid is the form associated with the 6th. In Steiner’s system, he said this is the two petal lotus.
Chakra 7 is likened to a 1000 petal lotus, the color purple and the spiritual concept of knowing. The highest pharoahs, priests and similar cultural archetypes would be expected to function on this level. It could also be likened to the presence of royalty and celebrity that inflates that socio-economic group to a very high earning potential. Living Art is what I theorized once.
The first three chakras are sometimes grouped together as the ‘lower’ functions and “other animals” can socialize and mate on these other levels, but it would seem that humans become unique, in consciousness terms by the functioning of the 4th-7th chakras. And survival is reasonable when the first three layers of being are taken care of, but survival doesn‘t require higher functioning and this is an issue in society not working as well as it ideally could. The higher functions are often underdeveloped or extinguished in psychosocial circumstances that are common, leaving people functionally/mentally less equipped to handle the challenges of life.
In my synthesis work, of understanding the multidimensional system of existence, as I have learned about human nature from Biology, Shamanism and Spiritual Science, I have also trained a bit in psychology. I have found much to learn from the Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, as I see how the layers of his psycho-social model correspond to levels of spiritual and emotional development according to spiritual science, that is influenced by eastern concepts through theosophy and the chakra system. Understanding these layers to how people operate and make decisions is interesting, as I people-watch and contemplate on what economic level a community might be functioning according to the services it is able to support.
So I think there is a way of objectively quantifying human labor resources along lines of value of a service to a community, taking into account the difficulty in educating to higher levels and giving to the community on rare levels, attained through psycho-social and spiritual development. The actual available resources for supporting a level of development vary and the same person can function on a 5-7th chakra level and suspend other activity, in energy-shunting ways, to achieve more on those levels. Or someone can devote themselves to a physical movement practice and ground into the body, when they may have previously indulged on creative insight for a project that required a lot of energy in the higher centers.
On the chakra level one: basic needs; food (covered)/ shelter (mostly covered)/ safety (mostly covered), but given the “mostly”, that means that I am still in need of this level of support, thus the job interviews/auditions of chakra level one work, which ties in closely with advertised-dollars per (sponsor) presence that can run in the millions (chakra level 7) and ‘any minute’ in the circuits that I roll with, who might recognize my talent for drawing people in better than others. It is curious the level of competition on this level of functioning.
On chakra two, anatomically located in the reproductive organs and symbolized by the color Orange, and qualities of Domesticity and family, I bought new jewelry for my navel piercing today, for the first time in 13 years. And boy is it sparkly. 5 black and white stars attached by sapphire ball to 14G purple metal barbell with purple opposing ball. I love it. I have offers for chakra level two up the wazoo. My current partner understands this system better than most. ~Sacred and Dangerous~ was a term that came up in a stage communication today in the astral living room. I like the folks I’m domesticating with at the moment.
Chakra level three is about the community. Symbolized by yellow flowers and the solar plexus, this is the spiritual organ that Rudolf Steiner connected as lotus with 10 petals. People functioning on this level are able to work. People too affected by social stimuli and other “mental illness” are not seemingly able to work very well. This is usually service-industry folks, not that that isn’t just their day job as they aspire to utmost heights in an art form. I feel loosely connected with my community here. There is some fracture on the issue of permanence. In LA, I’m chakra 3’ing just fine. I love you too, LA.. And if the Amero thing happens, It’s likely gonna have some very logical structure around the value of human labor tied in with agriculture and other economic standards tied in as well.
Chakra four is identified as the 12 petal lotus, in spiritual science terms. Love is the emotion most commonly associated with the heart region. There is a lot of interesting anatomy in the chest region that correlates with the pathology of the leading health risks in our culture. There are various emotional~spiritual~mental exercises that one can do to activate this spiritual organ. I think of the love on chakras 1, 2 & 3 as different than level 4. Vocationally, people who function on this higher chakra level are more educated, more bureaucratically distributed, and teachers, nurses, higher service work.
Chakra five is represented by the 16 petal lotus, the color blue, is centered at the throat, anatomically symbolized by the thyroid, which is shaped like a butterfly: a common image for creative energy. This is the creative will. People functioning on the level of the creative will are often working and involved in entertainment, politics, higher education, research & development. Interestingly, this is represented by the voice and in higher paced industries, people are in constant communication. Intricately tied with the Pituitary Gland, a gland that isn't as clearly understood in the chakra system I've been describing.
Chakra six is located at the Pineal gland, represented by the 3rd eye in a variety of symbolic systems and active on the surface of the body on the forehead. This is the spiritual level of Insight, represented by the color Indigo. People functioning on the level of seeing into systems are likely Intelligence operatives and other well-paid consultants. I heard that creational ability was about linking the spin of the 5-6th chakras, and in this way, it looks like the pituitary is functioning as a 5th chakra center (perhaps 5 1/2?) in a figure 8.
After learning about astral projection, I put together these concepts of esoteric anatomy, "will" = intention, creativity and control, and walking through a barrio one day, I taught some random 9 year-old kid how to hold his mom up like a dog by the scruff for self-defense. There is also sacred geometry associated with the chakra energies and the pyramid is the form associated with the 6th. In Steiner’s system, he said this is the two petal lotus.
Chakra 7 is likened to a 1000 petal lotus, the color purple and the spiritual concept of knowing. The highest pharoahs, priests and similar cultural archetypes would be expected to function on this level. It could also be likened to the presence of royalty and celebrity that inflates that socio-economic group to a very high earning potential. Living Art is what I theorized once.
The first three chakras are sometimes grouped together as the ‘lower’ functions and “other animals” can socialize and mate on these other levels, but it would seem that humans become unique, in consciousness terms by the functioning of the 4th-7th chakras. And survival is reasonable when the first three layers of being are taken care of, but survival doesn‘t require higher functioning and this is an issue in society not working as well as it ideally could. The higher functions are often underdeveloped or extinguished in psychosocial circumstances that are common, leaving people functionally/mentally less equipped to handle the challenges of life.
In my synthesis work, of understanding the multidimensional system of existence, as I have learned about human nature from Biology, Shamanism and Spiritual Science, I have also trained a bit in psychology. I have found much to learn from the Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, as I see how the layers of his psycho-social model correspond to levels of spiritual and emotional development according to spiritual science, that is influenced by eastern concepts through theosophy and the chakra system. Understanding these layers to how people operate and make decisions is interesting, as I people-watch and contemplate on what economic level a community might be functioning according to the services it is able to support.
So I think there is a way of objectively quantifying human labor resources along lines of value of a service to a community, taking into account the difficulty in educating to higher levels and giving to the community on rare levels, attained through psycho-social and spiritual development. The actual available resources for supporting a level of development vary and the same person can function on a 5-7th chakra level and suspend other activity, in energy-shunting ways, to achieve more on those levels. Or someone can devote themselves to a physical movement practice and ground into the body, when they may have previously indulged on creative insight for a project that required a lot of energy in the higher centers.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
two years ago today
Hi, everyone. I don't post to blogspot much, having some sense in the comfort in the history and hint of security of myspace. At least I know who might be reading instead of anyone who Google's me can read all about my life. But I'm about to get quite public and thought that some blanket over what's all over the internet might be good for my new job as public community college teacher and entrepreneur.
I have finally landed in my life, in the geography I feel second-most called to, about to start my dream career, splitting my professional time between teaching, healing and writing. I have envisioned this for a long time, the seeds of which were planted in early May 2006, when I was out of school, waiting for graduation, and took my then almost-3-year-old daughter to visit my sister in Portland, Oregon. Over the week, I processed a lot of therapy-realizations I had and determined that I was ready to end my 4 year marriage/ 6-year relationship. There was much "Boys for Pele" about, as the album I spent hours trying to buy and burn to a disc for the long road-trip. Again and again, like the vegan love truffle that Anastasia wanted more of.
These are the kinds of things I blog about. I have been living and publishing publicly about most aspects of my life for a little over two years, when "258" started. http://scaadium.com/projects. If one browses my website or reads this or the other blog or watches my Youtube videos (scaadium) they might have some idea about the intriguing madness I've been living, and in my experience, this tends to lead to stalking. I guess I'm interesting. But I'm really humble about it, chillin' in the chain-coffee shop that is supposedly gonna give me money some day, wearing a paint-splattered hoodie that advertises my older daughter's high school in Fair Oaks, California, that is so involved in the "258" saga that we are a most scandalous family around those parts.
I read my own material and feel like ducking under a table. It is sometimes embarrassing to review the decisions I made in a given moment, especially when my higher self has gained perspective or insight that would have me make a different decision now. People have different expectations on a messiah, in terms of (NOT) working for intelligence, making "Michael Corleone" decisions, as I sorta was in September and October. But if some chain-smoking jar head orders another 5-digit troop increase to a war to steal Opium, it's socially expected.
So, two years ago today, I agreed to let my mom pick me up in Orange County, California after I lost "258" and was about to be thrown in a psych ward for the government to blow enough snow to cover-up the near collapse of the functioning world as only I could accomplish. It really happened and there will be a movie someday, based on just Jan/Feb 2008, but it will be framed as sub-fiction and everyone can rest-assured that the decision-making in Washington D.C. is still left to elected representatives (virtually owned by corporate and religious interests). It's very exciting to be an informed citizen.
In the interval two years, I have been under an enormous level of control, in terms of which jobs I could work, given the geographic hostility over what happened in "258" and the government not wanting me to be discovered publicly. Mostly, I worked on my soul-development and healing skills, through odd jobs and philosophic work. I also logged a lot of hours of hands-on therapy, self-healing and kinesthetic work. I lived on two different farms and in care-giving and other group-living situations, really getting to know people.
And thus I feel ready to start my practice as a Shaman/Holistic Advisor...
[re-reading a year later, I wish the healer practice would have manifested instead of the continued hell of institutional psychiatric and correctional systems education I got.]
I have finally landed in my life, in the geography I feel second-most called to, about to start my dream career, splitting my professional time between teaching, healing and writing. I have envisioned this for a long time, the seeds of which were planted in early May 2006, when I was out of school, waiting for graduation, and took my then almost-3-year-old daughter to visit my sister in Portland, Oregon. Over the week, I processed a lot of therapy-realizations I had and determined that I was ready to end my 4 year marriage/ 6-year relationship. There was much "Boys for Pele" about, as the album I spent hours trying to buy and burn to a disc for the long road-trip. Again and again, like the vegan love truffle that Anastasia wanted more of.
These are the kinds of things I blog about. I have been living and publishing publicly about most aspects of my life for a little over two years, when "258" started. http://scaadium.com/projects. If one browses my website or reads this or the other blog or watches my Youtube videos (scaadium) they might have some idea about the intriguing madness I've been living, and in my experience, this tends to lead to stalking. I guess I'm interesting. But I'm really humble about it, chillin' in the chain-coffee shop that is supposedly gonna give me money some day, wearing a paint-splattered hoodie that advertises my older daughter's high school in Fair Oaks, California, that is so involved in the "258" saga that we are a most scandalous family around those parts.
I read my own material and feel like ducking under a table. It is sometimes embarrassing to review the decisions I made in a given moment, especially when my higher self has gained perspective or insight that would have me make a different decision now. People have different expectations on a messiah, in terms of (NOT) working for intelligence, making "Michael Corleone" decisions, as I sorta was in September and October. But if some chain-smoking jar head orders another 5-digit troop increase to a war to steal Opium, it's socially expected.
So, two years ago today, I agreed to let my mom pick me up in Orange County, California after I lost "258" and was about to be thrown in a psych ward for the government to blow enough snow to cover-up the near collapse of the functioning world as only I could accomplish. It really happened and there will be a movie someday, based on just Jan/Feb 2008, but it will be framed as sub-fiction and everyone can rest-assured that the decision-making in Washington D.C. is still left to elected representatives (virtually owned by corporate and religious interests). It's very exciting to be an informed citizen.
In the interval two years, I have been under an enormous level of control, in terms of which jobs I could work, given the geographic hostility over what happened in "258" and the government not wanting me to be discovered publicly. Mostly, I worked on my soul-development and healing skills, through odd jobs and philosophic work. I also logged a lot of hours of hands-on therapy, self-healing and kinesthetic work. I lived on two different farms and in care-giving and other group-living situations, really getting to know people.
And thus I feel ready to start my practice as a Shaman/Holistic Advisor...
[re-reading a year later, I wish the healer practice would have manifested instead of the continued hell of institutional psychiatric and correctional systems education I got.]
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